Relationship Principle 11 It is better to be disliked for being who you are than to be loved for who you are not.
Your power gets lost the minute you start asking, “Where do I stand?” Because what you’ve just told him is that the terms of the relationship are now his to dictate.
When you react emotionally, it gives him a feeling of control. And if you react emotionally frequently, over time he will come to see you as less of a mental challenge. If he can’t predict how you’ll always react, you remain a challenge.
It’s smothering to him when you watch him too closely. Don’t give him the feeling he’s under a microscope. He’ll feel controlled and will instantly want to get away.
As a person, you feel you are complete with him or without him. This is the most important thing you can convey: independence rather than dependence. This is what gives him the perception you can hold your own.
The dumb fox knows that the less she criticizes, the better. Which is why she doesn’t nag. Instead, she maneuvers.
It also gives him something he absolutely needs: the freedom to breathe.
Or, if he tries to get a woman to react in an insecure way but she holds herself with a level of dignity and pride, suddenly the dynamic changes.
An understated demeanor and a confident attitude will convince him you’re gorgeous. Never assume you are not attractive enough, and therefore you have to overcompensate or chase a man. Taste is subjective. One man’s “ugly” is another man’s “beautiful.” The first date is about looks. When he falls in love, it’s about your attitude. It’s about whether you can hold your own. Which is all about how you hold yourself.
He can get aroused from riding a motorcycle or from sleeping. The issue is not whether you turn him on; it’s whether he stays turned on after he has been satisfied. This is the key.
Her aura says she doesn’t want him desperately enough, need him desperately enough, or let him get under her skin enough.
She keeps communication from getting messy and avoids communicating when upset. When she clears her head, she is succinct and speaks in a “bottom line” way.
A man knows which woman will give in to last-minute requests.
But inside every sweet peach is a strong pit. And this means she won’t explain the obvious when a man is disrespectful. There is no way to hold your own in a relationship and simultaneously accept rude behavior. A.
The very second he thinks he has to explain himself to you, he’ll feel as though he is losing his freedom. Then he’ll make up a story to conceal something that didn’t need to be concealed, just to protect his “territory” or his “turf.” And he’ll feel cornered.
Don’t plan all of your weekends together so he has to ask permission to go fishing. Let him catch a couple of fish. Otherwise, he’ll start to break dates. Why? Because he’s acting like a rebellious teenager who’s been given a curfew by mama. He’ll do it deliberately so you don’t get used to dictating how his time is spent.
When you treat your time together as something he has to do, you’ve taken something that was a pleasure and made it a chore. If you are nice, but you give of yourself with strings attached, the demand for reciprocity will send him several steps backward. Whenever you make him feel as though he has to see you, it will feel like work. When it’s not an obligation to see you, the very same thing will feel like pleasure.
Whenever a woman requires too many things from a man, he’ll resent it. Let him give.
She can stand on her own two feet. So, instead of feeling as if he’s lost his freedom, he feels as though he’s gained a strong woman. The relationship is a contributing force, rather than.
Don’t give a reward for bad behavior.
Act Like a Prize and You’ll Turn Him into a Believer.