What did the carrot say to the wheat? Lettuce rest, I’m feeling beet.
I know a way to stay friends forever, There’s really nothing to it, I tell you what to do, And you do it.
If you’re behind the times, they won’t notice you. If you’re right in tune with them, you’re no better than they are, so they won’t care much for you. Be just a little ahead of them.
Stand-up comics reflect less of a visual humor and more of a commentary.
How many slams in an old screen door? Depends how loud you shut it. How many slices in a bread? Depends how thin you cut it. How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live ’em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give ’em.
If you are a dreamer come in If you are a dreamer a wisher a liar A hoper a pray-er a magic-bean-buyer If youre a pretender com sit by my fire For we have some flax golden tales to spin Come in! Come in!
There is a place where the sidewalk ends, And before the street begins, And there the grass grows soft and white, And there the sun burns crimson bright, And there the moon-bird rests from his flight To cool in the peppermint wind.
And he didn’t really know where he was going, but he did know he was going somewhere, because you really have to go somewhere, don’t you?
Each time I see the Upside-Down Man Standing in the water, I look at him and start to laugh, Although I shouldn’t oughtter. For maybe in another world Another time Another town, Maybe HE is right side up And I am upside down.
Don’t know where he’s going but sees where he’s been.
If you are a dreamer come in.
Ricky was “L” but he’s home with the flu, Lizzie, our “O,” had some homework to do, Mitchell, “E” prob’ly got lost on the way, So I’m all of the love that could make it today.
INVISIBLE BOY And here we see the invisible boy In his lovely invisible house, Feeding a piece of invisible cheese To a little invisible mouse. Oh, what a beautiful picture to see! Will you draw an invisible picture for me?
This boat that we just built is just fine – And don’t try to tell us it’s not The sides and the back are divine – It’s the bottom I guess we forgot.
Listen to the voice that speaks inside.
Comfortable shoes and the freedom to leave are the two most important things in life.
If you are a dreamer come sit by my fire, for we have some flax golden tails to spin, come in, come in.
Make it so good and so clear that it doesn’t need any further explanation.
Through gypsy camps and swirling Arab fair, and moonlit woods where unicorns run free.
Eddie touched a troll.
You do something, you make it simple, and everybody else starts loading it up with deep meanings. Which is okay with me, if they want to do that. Everybody loves Rorshach tests.