But I give you my word, in the entire book there is nothing that cannot be said aloud in mixed company. And there is, also, nothing that makes you a bit the wiser. I wonder – oh, what will you think of me – if those two statements do not verge upon the synonymous.

— Dorothy Parker

Dorothy Parker Quotes

There was always something immensely comic to her in the thought of living elsewhere than New York. She could not regard as serious proposals that she share a western residence.

— Dorothy Parker

Men don’t like nobility in woman. Not any men. I suppose it is because the men like to have the copyrights on nobility – if there is going to be anything like that in a relationship.

— Dorothy Parker

Money is only congealed snow.

— Dorothy Parker

I’ve finally gotten to the bottom of things.

— Dorothy Parker

Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you – And if that makes you happy, kid, You’ll be the first it ever did.

— Dorothy Parker

Benchley and I had an office in the old Life magazine that was so tiny, if it were an inch smaller it would have been adultery.

— Dorothy Parker

The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man.

— Dorothy Parker

Art is a form of catharsis.

— Dorothy Parker

Art is a form of catharsis, emotional release, purging, cleansing, purifying.

— Dorothy Parker

His books are exciting and powerful and – if I may filch the word from the booksy ones – pulsing.

— Dorothy Parker

Book

This play John Drinkwater’s Abraham Lincoln holds the season’s record, thus far, with a run of four evening performances and one matinee. By an odd coincidence, it ran just five performances too many.

— Dorothy Parker

Then if my friendships break and bend, There’s little need to cry The while I know that every foe Is faithful till I die.

— Dorothy Parker

There was a reason for the cost of those perfectly plain black dresses.

— Dorothy Parker

Her big heart did not, as is so sadly often the case, inhabit a big bosom.

— Dorothy Parker

I misremember who first was cruel enough to nurture the cocktail party into life. But perhaps it would be not too much to say, in fact it would be not enough to say, that it was not worth the trouble.

— Dorothy Parker

And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.

— Dorothy Parker

Excuse me, everybody, I have to go to the bathroom. I really have to telephone, but I’m too embarrassed to say so.

— Dorothy Parker

He is a writer for the ages, the ages of four to eight.

— Dorothy Parker

Three highballs, and I think I’m St. Francis of Assisi.

— Dorothy Parker

I know that there are things that never have been funny, and never will be. And I know that ridicule may be a shield, but it is not a weapon.

— Dorothy Parker

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