Luke came out when I slid down the lever on the slice of bread. I heard him moving around but I started at the toaster as if I was certain it would animate and start dancing around like all the stuff in the Beast’s house in that Disney movie and I didn’t want to miss the show.

— Kristen Ashley

Kristen Ashley Quotes

I was in no mood to argue. I was in the mood to go to sleep for fifty years, wake up and old maid and live out my life in a nursing home with my only excitement being Friday Night Bingo.

— Kristen Ashley

You’re going to take me now, Maddie, and warning, my dove, I’ll not be gentle.

— Kristen Ashley

A touch, only a hint, of everything. An intriguing woman does not share her secrets in any way. She does not speak of them, she does not give them away through her manner and she definitely does not make the mistake of giving them away through her appearance.

— Kristen Ashley

Hate no one, for hate is a starving beast who has just found its prey.

— Kristen Ashley

Hate is not a feeling toward another, but a feeling of defeat by another.

— Kristen Ashley

It’s never too late to reach for happiness and no matter what life has done to you, it’s never too late to find it.

— Kristen Ashley

I’m not going to work in a place where I can’t eat donuts.

— Kristen Ashley

I can’t function around a man if I know his ability to give pleasure.

— Kristen Ashley

Then she declared loudly, “Smoke break!” and everyone’s eyes came to us, some of them shocked seeing as these days you could light up a doobie and no one would blink but if you lit up a smoke, you courted being publicly stoned to death.

— Kristen Ashley

Thank you for keeping it a secret. There aren’t many of those in this tribe.

— Kristen Ashley

Rule Number One in the India Savage Life Code: When in doubt or possible trouble, lie.

— Kristen Ashley

Seriously, I don’t care if feminists hunt me down and burn me at the stake, that man crooked his finger at me, I’d follow him into a bank and rob it at his side.

— Kristen Ashley

You got one life, never use it just to breathe.

— Kristen Ashley

Even though I felt like crying, I did my very best to smile.

— Kristen Ashley

You lose anyone, there’s no replacing them. What you need to get is that’s precious, you get to keep that, you don’t want to replace it. That doesn’t mean you can’t find something else just as good.

— Kristen Ashley

Seriously. Who needed a real lover when you had a handsome, affectionate man who adored you, put a beautiful house over your head, gave you a great job, lavished you with fabulous clothes, shoes, purses and jewelry and would never break your heart?

— Kristen Ashley

I prefer your smiles and laughter, wife, but there are far worse things than your tears wetting my skin.

— Kristen Ashley

Forgiveness is beautiful and it feels good when someone gives that gift to you. But it’s one thing for someone you wronged to forgive you. It was another to forgive yourself.

— Kristen Ashley

Never bury something deep, baby. Takes twice as much courage to be who you are, say what you think, feel what you feel and let it show then it does to bury it.

— Kristen Ashley

My life was over, finished, and I’d never seen Pearl Jam play live.

— Kristen Ashley
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