Sometimes humour is all we have to say the things that can’t be said.
Sit down and shut up,” said Melody. “You volunteered for this.” Happy looked at her. “I did? When?” “When I told you to,” said Melody. “Oh, well, that’s all right then,” said Happy. He sat down.
The next few rooms held a severed hand that was trying to grow itself a new body; a Time Agent whose latest regeneration had gone terribly wrong, turning him inside out; and a sorry-looking werewolf with mange.
This is like when we have an argument,” Happy said to Melody. “And you go stomping around the room, being mad at me but refusing to say what’s wrong because I’m supposed to know. And I never do.
You can learn all kinds of useful things at a really good finishing school,’ she said. ‘So don’t try anything like that again, or I will show you the special ball-breaking kick the nuns taught me at St Theresa’s School for Exemplary Youngsters.
They burn down Satanist churches, perform exorcisms on politicians, and they once crucified a street mime. Upside down. And then they set fire to him. A lot of people applauded.
A defrocked heretic accountant, Grimm had learned just enough mathemagics to be a nuisance, if not actually dangerous, and had been thrown out of the Accountants’ Guild for unethical use of imaginary numbers.
The bleeding’s stopped,’ I said. ‘You know I heal quickly.’ ‘Not that quickly,’ said Penny. ‘All right,’ I said. ‘If there’s any fighting to be done, you can do it.’ ‘You’re too kind,’ said Penny. ‘I’ve always thought so,’ I said.
I am large. I contain multitudes,” I said solemnly. “Especially on Tuesdays.
Are you really as good as they say?” “No,” she said calmly. “We’re better.
There’s something up ahead,’ I said. ‘Something really bad.’ ‘So of course we’re heading straight for it,’ said Penny. ‘At some point, we’re going to have to sit down and have a serious talk about making better lifestyle decisions.
Beyond a certain point, hope is more than self-indulgence. It’s self-harm.
Never look back,” I said wisely. “All you’ll ever see are lost opportunities creeping up on you with bad intent.
Don’t you dare try to out-gloom me. I’m the only one here entitled to indulge in deep dark existential brooding.
It’s only a short step from a burning bush to a burning heretic, after all. I try not to bother God, and hope He’ll do me the same courtesy.
Let her come,” JC said to Latimer. “She’ll only make a fuss if we don’t.” “Loudly and violently and all over the place,” said Chang.
Because she never trusted anything until she’d seen it with her own eyes. And preferably kicked it a few times.
Why don’t you just shoot yourself in the head now and get it over with?
All the assassins that could have come after me, and I had to get a double-jointed contortionist kick-boxer.
It’s not your uncle Harvey again, is it?” I said. “The one who thinks he’s a giant rabbit?
This,′ I explained to the Demon Lordz, ’is Suzy Shooter. Also known as Shotgun Suzie, also known as Oh, Christ, it’s her, run.