The clearer the rules and the limits enforced by parents, the higher the child’s self-esteem. The more freedom the child had, the lower his self-esteem.
Positive thinking is the notion that if you think good thoughts, things will work out well. Optimism is the feeling of thinking things will be well and be hopeful.
I’m trying to broaden the scope of positive psychology well beyond the smiley face. Happiness is just one-fifth of what human beings choose to do.
Not only do happy people endure pain better and take more health and safety precautions when threatened, but positive emotions undo negative emotions.
Once a depressed person becomes active and hopeful, self-esteem always improves. Bolstering self-esteem without changing hopelessness, without changing passivity, accomplishes nothing.
The Fundamentalist Religions simply seem to offer more hope for a brighter future than do the more liberal, humanistic ones.
Whether or not we have hope depends on two dimensions of our explanatory style; pervasiveness and permanence.
The optimistic style of explaining good events is the opposite of that used for bad events: It’s internal rather than external.
The pleasant life: a life that successfully pursues the positive emotions about the present, past, and future.
Finding permanent and universal causes for misfortune is the practice of despair...
I believe that traditional wisdom is incomplete.
Finding temporary and specific causes for misfortune is the art of hope: Temporary causes limit helplessness in time, and specific causes limit helplessness to the original situation.
One of the things psychologists used to say was that if you are depressed, anxious or angry, you couldn’t be happy. Those were at opposite ends of a continuum. I believe that you can be suffering or have a mental illness and be happy – just not in the same moment that you’re sad.
If we just wanted positive emotions, our species would have died out a long time ago.
There are physical characteristics which are inherited. These include things like good looks, high intelligence, physical coordination. These attributes contribute to success in life, and success in life is a determinant of optimism.
Some find that very optimistic people have benign illusions about themselves. These people may think they have more control, or more skill, than they actually do. Others have found that optimistic people have a good handle on reality. The jury is still out.
On the relationship side, if you teach people to respond actively and constructively when someone they care about has a victory, it increases love and friendship and decreases the probability of depression.
Positive, optimistic sales people sell more than pessimistic sales people.
On the other hand, permanent causes produce helplessness far into the future, and universal causes spread helplessness through all your endeavors.
By activating an expansive, tolerant, and creative mindset, positive feelings maximize the social, intellectual, and physical benefits that will accrue.
There is one aspect of happiness that’s been well studied, and it’s the notion of flow. Ask yourselves, when for you does time stop? When are you truly at home, wanting to be no place else?