If a donkey could talk, and if the donkey had a sore throat, and if it spoke with a French accent – that was what Mr. Gorf’s voice sounded like.
My heart is breaking.” “I can fix that,” said Sam. She turned to him. He took hold of both of her hands, and kissed her.
Zero took the shovel. Then he swung it like a baseball bat. The metal blade smashed across Mr. Pendanski’s face. His knees crumpled beneath him. He was unconscious before he hit the ground.
You’re an idiot, Goon, you know that?” Paul Wattenburg said to him one morning. “No, as a matter of fact I didn’t,” Goon said, then laughed. He called himself Goon too. On the first day of school, his math teacher, Miss Langley, asked him his name and he said, “Goon.” “I beg your pardon,” said Miss Langley. “See, my name’s Gary Boone,” Gary.
Wait a second. I don’t have to tell you. You already know. Todd was sent to your school.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
In a few years, Camp Greenlake will be a girl scout camp.
A short while later, both boys fell asleep. Behind them, the sky had turned dark, and for the first time in over a hundred years, a drop of rain fell into the empty lake.
I once had a teacher who told me I’d be twice as smart if I was half as smart as I thought I was. I’m still trying to figure that one out.
That’s not weird,” said Jenny. “That’s normal. Try reading a story backward. That’s weird. I’m the weird one in this class.” “That’s a laugh!” said Rondi. “If you’re so weird, then how come you never asked Louis to kick you in the teeth? I’m the one who’s crazy!” “No, that’s not crazy,” said Todd. “I’ll tell.
Suck your toes. That’s what I do,” said Sharie. But Leslie’s foot wouldn’t reach her mouth. “Well, that’s all toes are good for,” said Sharie. She put her foot in her mouth and went to sleep. “No,” thought Leslie. “They must be good for something.
All too soon Stanley was back out on the lake, sticking his shovel into the dirt. X-Ray was right: the third hole was the hardest.
It was a box of tissues.
The reader is probably asking: Why would anyone go to Camp Green Lake? Most campers weren’t given a choice. Camp Green Lake is a camp for bad boys. If you take a bad boy and make him dig a hole every day in the hot sun, it will turn him into a good boy. That was what some people thought. Stanley Yelnats was given a choice. The judge said, “You may go to jail, or you may go to Camp Green Lake.” Stanley was from a poor family. He had never been to camp before.
With your help I can scratch both legs at the same time.” “No, never mind,” said Leslie. She walked up behind Louis, the yard teacher, and hopped on his shoulders. “Louis,” said Leslie. “I don’t know what to do with my toes.” Louis tugged her foot. “Yes, that is a serious problem,” he said, “but I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll take them off your hands for you, or rather, your feet. Just cut them off and.
But then a miracle happened. A new kid came to school. The new kid couldn’t talk. She had no teeth. She was almost bald. She was beautiful. Her name was Mavis Jewls. She was only four days old. She really was a new kid.
After all, you only have one life, so you should make the most of it.
Allison,” said Mrs. Jewls. “You learned a very important secret today, and I don’t want you to tell any of the other children, not even Rondi.” “What was that?” asked Allison. She didn’t even know she had learned a secret. She loved secrets. “You learned that children are really smarter than their teachers,” said Mrs. Jewls. “Oh, that’s no secret,” said Allison. “Everybody knows that.
Fly high, my baby bird, My angel, my only.
So remember,” said Mr. Kidswatter. “And please be careful! Always check to see if a door is open before going through it. And if it’s not open, open it.
Mr. Sir stared at her. He had three long red marks slanting across the left side of his face. Stanley didn’t know if the redness was caused by her nail polish or his blood. It took a moment for the venom to sink in. Suddenly, Mr. Sir screamed and clutched his face with both hands. He let himself fall over, rolling off the hearth and onto the rug.