I’m just gonna do a podcast because it’s mine, I can control it, I have complete responsibility over it, and no one can touch it.
Sober strip clubs are horrible. When you are sober you see the matrix code behind a strip club. You’re paying girls to pretend to like you until you run out of money so they can walk away.
Some people learn comedy, and some people just are comedy.
The nerds provide the toys that distract the morons. So the nerds are sort of the new drug-dealers. We’re the drug dealers of the 21st century because we provide all the brain candy for the mouth-breathers, for lack of a better word.
Just as someone who’s been interested in radio and programming for so long, I can usually tell when an interviewer is doing a segment just to fill a programming slot. They ask questions, but they don’t care about the answers.
American television constantly tries to co-op British comedy and create their own version of it. Most of the time it doesn’t work; obviously, in the case of ‘The Office,’ it did. But a lot of times, it doesn’t really work.
I almost think of nerd brains as rattlesnake venom; like, you can milk it. You can milk the pulpy venom out of the nerd brain and use it for good if you want to.
You don’t need 30 million people to listen to your podcast. If 10,000 people listen to your podcast, which is not a hard number to achieve, then 10,000 people are listening, and you can build a community, and literally change the world just recording into a microphone.
If you can build your career around your passions, then you’re winning in life; that’s one of the best things you can ask for.
Comic-Con is interesting because there’s so much going on at once, it’s literally impossible to do everything. You need clones and some sort of hoverboard so you can surf over the crowd of packed-in nerds.
When you look at your freelance career, it’s really like a mall. And if you look at a mall, it’s a self-contained system that has a flow and logic to it. You’ll probably have one or two really bigger jobs, those are like your anchor stores.
We didn’t understand irony yet in the ’80s; we just kind of existed at face value, so there was no nerd cool yet because the digital revolution was still in its infancy.
You can’t throw money at the Internet to make it work – it really is all about the quality of the content.
There’s not many a man who would get shot and then come visit the family responsible.
Stand-up isn’t something I just sit down and start writing – it’s ideas you come up with in the shower, while you’re driving, waiting in line.
Alcohol is like pouring smiles on your brain.
If you do a joke that’s really old, then what happens is people on Reddit and Twitter just go, ‘Real original, you’re just doing old jokes!’ But bands do it all the time.
I think when I look out and I see there’s so much negativity in the world and a lot of people are unhappy and a lot people are anxious, it just feels like that’s one view of the world. But you don’t have to always focus on that view of the world.
I played tournament chess from fifth grade up into high school.
Comedy has sort of been my life-long obsession. I literally obsessed over comedy. I really didn’t play sports – for me it was just comedy, computers and chess club; those were my big things.