Ha, but my life is a box of wormgears.
I can see we’re in for a fabulous evening’s apocalypse.
Would you like me to go and stick my head in a bucket of water?
Presidents don’t have power. Their job is to draw attention away from it.
I’m 48, which is a bit of a shock to me. Why only last year I thought I was a precocious young thing!
If you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language.
Who should play the lead role in a film about me? Dunno. Danny De Vito? Jeff Goldblum? Meryl Streep? Someone of that kind.
If there was one thing life had taught her it was that there are times when you do not go back for your bag and times when you do. It had yet to teach her to distinguish between the two types of occasion.
There is a piece of me that likes to fondly imagine my maverick and rebellious nature, but, more accurately, I like to have a nice and cosy institution that I can rub up against a little bit.
I wanted to be John Cleese. It took me some time to realise that the job was taken.
The single raindrop never feels responsible for the flood.
But for a moment Dirk had a sense of inifinite loss and sadness that somewhere among the frenzy of information noise that daily rattled the lives of men he thought he might have heard a few notes that denoted the movements of gods.
The dew has fallen with a particularly sickening thud this morning.
The lights went out in his eyes for absolutely the very last time ever.
The reason why so many sects hang around airports looking for converts: they know that people there are at their most vulnerable and perplexed, and ready to accept any kind of guidance.
The difference between us and a computer is that, the computer is blindingly stupid, but it is capable of being stupid many, many million times a second.
Space is unimaginably big.
My own strategy is to find a car, or the nearest equivalent, which looks as if it knows where it’s going and follow it. I rarely end up where I was intending to go, but often I end up somewhere I needed to be.
Democracy is all about not electing the wrong man-eating lizard.
Anything that happens, happens.