As my meditative experiences grew, I had wonderful relationships. I met the most wonderful women, who meditated and shared certain understandings that I had.
I seemed to be leading a very incongruous life from the point of view of the definition of the community I was in.
I went through times of self-hate, thinking how undeveloped spiritual I was. Everyone else in the ashram, a thousand people, nobody had a girlfriend or boyfriend. I did.
I realized that my friends in the ashram needed to be celibate because, for them, sexuality was a very tacky issue.
Over the years of much self-hate, I came to realize that whether sexuality was in my life or not, it didn’t seem to matter. I just surrendered the whole thing to God.
During those years the past life recollections began. Psychic powers developed, my meditation increased and I found myself changing, over and over again, becoming someone new almost every day.
Someone else would come, another self that was a little more refined, that had a little more purity, a little more humility, because I was quite egotistical, I thought I was quite wonderful.
My teacher sent me all over the world to talk about meditation – Europe, all over America, Canada. I would drive thousands of miles, travel, all at my own expense, to do this.
I liked my teacher very much and after some years of mediation, I began to teach meditation, referring all things that I didn’t know to my own teacher.
As the years progressed, my spiritual evolution seemed to increase in speed. I stepped outside this world, the selves reordered. The combination, the aggregate of beings that I was, dissolved in the white light of eternity.
At a certain point I left my spiritual teacher because I began to see the limitations of my teacher, who was a very powerful occultist, but who I thought was, to some extent, limiting others in their spiritual growth.
So I went off on my own and started the process of spiritual teaching.
I began to go into samadhi, not just occasionally, but every day many times a day until I reached a point where I could no longer distinguish between ordinary and non-ordinary reality. For me it is all the same. I am in a state of continuous absorption in the Self.
From the Far Eastern perspective, 29 is considered a very special age.
Astrologically, at that age, you experience a Saturn return. It is considered an auspicious time to “reboot” your life. It’s a chance to have a clean start and move forward into something very exciting.
One day I was meditating on a cliff overlooking the ocean in Southern California and I was absorbed in a state of high meditation. As I came out of the meditation and became aware of the sense world the world around me I knew that I had a new name. And the name, of course, was Rama.
Rama is a fairly common name in India. It symbolizes an individual who is interested both in enlightenment and martial arts. I do not claim to have any past life connection with the historical Rama. It’s just a name I liked.
I too have experienced the extreme pain of living, but I have also experienced some of its remarkable ecstasy.
I am the happiest person I’ve ever met. This is what Buddhist Yoga and a healthy dose of reading the Declaration of the Independence, The Constitution and the Federalist Papers and anything else I could get my hands on has given me.
I don’t have the luxury of time to be unhappy. I have too much to do. I have too much do accomplish. Who has the time to be unhappy?