Age is mind over matter. If you don’t mind it doesn’t matter.
Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
Comedy itself is based upon very old principles of which I can readily name seven. They are, in short: the joke, exaggeration, ridicule, ignorance, surprise, the pun, and finally, the comic situation.
Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese. Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
I feel responsible for Johnny Ray’s success. See many years ago I asked him to be on my show and he asked for a lot of money and I cried. And he stole that from me.
I took my girl to dinner, and she laughed so hard at one of my jokes that she dropped her tray.
Everything good that happened to me happened by accident.
I practice three hours daily on my violin so I won’t get worse.
I went to a meeting for premature ejactulators. I left early.
I gambled at the crap table all night and finally lost $8, but during that time the house gave me four drinks and two cigars, so it was still a lot cheaper than renting a room.
If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
A rich man is one who isn’t afraid to ask the salesperson to show him something cheaper.