Life is too short, Harry. And there’s nowhere near enough joy in it. If you find it, grab it. Before it’s gone.
Chocolate fends off all kinds of nasty stuff. And if you get hungry while warding off evil, you have a snack. It’s multipurpose equipment.
I’ve been a young man. Boobs are near the center of the universe, until you turn twenty-five or so. Which is also when young men’s auto insurance rates go down. This is not a coincidence.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chinese throwing stars get you a dozen stitches.
He’s Gandalf on crack and an IV of Red Bull, with a big leather coat and a .44 revolver in his pocket.
We’ve both got into the blue beetle. He got into the red door, I got into the white one.
The married thing. Sometimes I look at it and feel like someone from a Dickens novel, standing outside in the cold and staring in at Christmas dinner. Relationships hadn’t ever really worked for me. I think it’s had something to do with all the demons, ghosts, and human sacrifice.
Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is ajar.
Fear is bred from ignorance. So knowledge is a weapon against it, and reason is the tool of knowledge.
I felt my face stretch in a victorious smile. The potion had worked. I was inside. I had to suppress an urge to break into a soft shoe routine. Sometimes being able to use magic was so cool.
A pure heart and mind only takes you so far – sooner or later the hormones have their say, too.
I’m pretty sure lurking in a dark alley to mug me with your apology isn’t the usual way to go about saying you’re sorry. But I didn’t read that Mars-Venus book, so who knows.
No rest for the wicked, Bob, and that means that we can’t slack off either, or they’ll outwork us.
I like to stay cozy with my paranoia, not pass her around to my friends and family.
The human mind isn’t a terribly logical or consistent place. Most people, given the choice to face a hideous or terrifying truth or to conveniently avoid it, choose the convenience and peace of normality. That doesn’t make them strong or weak people, or good or bad people. It just makes them people.
The impossible we do immediately. The unimaginable takes a little while.
In the name of the Pizza Lord. Charge!
The cold rain came down in buckets. I was shaking, shivering, and naked, and more soap was getting into my eyes. But hey. At least I was clean.
Yeah, but I forgot to take my George Orwell-shaped multivitamins along with my breakfast bowl of Big Brother Os this morning.
Now I feel like James Bond. Suave and intelligent, breaking all the codes while looking fabulous.