The right hand doesn’t know what the left is doing” is a phrase that refers to times when people ought to know, but don’t know, about something that is happening very close to them. For instance, you ought to know about the man who watches you when you sleep.
The quoting of an aphorism, like the angry barking of a dog or the smell of overcooked broccoli, rarely indicates that something helpful is about to happen.
Blinded following the Blindfolded.
When trouble strikes, head to the library. You will either be able to solve the problem, or simply have something to read as the world crashes down around you.
Grammar is the greatest joy in life, don’t you find?
I know that having a good vocabulary doesn’t guarantee that I’m a good person, but it does mean I’ve read a great deal. And in my experience, well-read people are less likely to be evil.
Never look a gift lion in the mouth.
What do your parents know, about surviving?
Fight Fire with Fire.
You’re just jealous of me because I’m a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian!
Money is like a child – rarely unaccompanied. When it disappears, look to those who were supposed to be keeping an eye on it while you were at the grocery store. You might also look for someone who has a lot of extra children sitting around, with long, suspicious explanations for how they got there.
The last safe place is safe no more.
I’m not a stranger,” I said, and pointed to his book. “I’m someone who reads the same authors you do.
Nobody wants to fall into a safety net, because it means the structure in which they’ve been living is in a state of collapse and they have no choice but to tumble downwards. However, it beats the alternative.
Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding.
The last time I saw you, I was trying to throw thumbtacks into your cradle!
If everyone fought fire with fire, the whole world would go up in smoke.
I will love you as a thief loves a gallery and as a crow loves a murder, as a cloud loves bats and as a range loves braes. I will love you as misfortune loves orphans, as fire loves innocence, and as justice loves to sit and watch while everything goes wrong.
Anyone who thinks the pen is mightier than the sword has not been stabbed with both.
Tee hee torture!