He thought about how it might be to be, say, a fox confronted with an angry sheep. A sheep moreover, that could afford to employ wolves.
I wouldn’t trust you with a bucket of water if my knickers were on fire!
It was sad, like those businessmen who came to work in serious clothes but wore colorful ties in a mad, desperate attempt to show there was a free spirit in there somewhere.
He had about the same life expectancy as a three legged hedgehog on a six lane motorway.
He’s out of his depth on a wet pavement.
They felt, in fact, tremendously bucked-up, which was how Lady Ramkin would almost certainly have put it and which was definitely several letters of the alphabet away from how they normally felt.
Ridcully was to management what King Herod was to the Bethlehem Playgroup Association.
His sister had been sent down to the village to ask Mistress Garlick the witch how you stopped spelling recommendation.
Real children do not go hoppity skip unless they are on drugs.
Now he knew: They were real. Who’d make up a thing like this? Okay, one of them was a cheese that rolled around of its own accord, but nobody was perfect.
He moved in a way that suggested he was attempting the world speed record for the nonchalant walk.
They may have been ugly. They may have been evil. But when it came to poetry in motion, the Things had all the grace and coordination of a deck-chair.
If you don’t know when to be a human being, you don’t know when to be a witch.
Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.
Fear is a strange soil. It grows obedience like corn, which grow in straight lines to make weeding easier. But sometimes it grows the potatoes of defiance, which flourish underground.
This book was written using 100% recycled words.
Chances are where you find them.
Even if it’s not your fault, it’s your responsibility.
Knowing things is magical, if other people don’t know them.
And what had he wanted? He’d never sat down to think about it. But mostly, he wanted yesterday to be different from today.