My man parts are crying.
Nine hours, two pizzas, one fight, three instances of vomiting, a million whistles, tons of snacks, and countless drinks later, we learned that I could have one drink every eighteen minutes, or three in one hour. Absolutely no more. Even with my body’s ability to burn the alcohol, I was what my father deemed a “lightweight” or “cheap date.
Anna finds remnants of cocaine on my coffee table and goes all daughter-of-Belial on me.
To love or have loved, that is enough... There is no other pearl to be found in the dark folds of life.
In two days I’ll fly to Georgia to sign estate paperwork and retrieve Father’s remains, which are going straight down a toilet at the dodgiest petrol station I can find.
You’re my dream. My only dream.
I saw now that love could not be stopped, forgotten, or transferred, no matter what schemes the mind and body devised.
I talk her into taking an outdoor shower, and I promise to keep an eye out for whisperers, but there are a few moments as we wash where hands wander and I get a bit distracted. It’d be safe to assume the wandering hands belong to yours truly, but I’m happy to announce Anna is the culprit. Can’t keep the girl’s hands off me.
Sexting is dangerous business. I don’t recommend it.
Yeah. I’m pretty sure I spent a good part of the day making everyone uncomfortable as I stalked Anna, trailing her through Patti’s house. And it’s just my luck the whole lot would be here to witness my temporary madness – Kope, Zania, Jay, the twins, Blake, and worst of all, Patti.
I won’t just be swallowing my pride; I’ll be choking on it.
If life was a game, like everyone said, then I wanted to win. I held up my hands to the heavens. Deal me in.
Life would be so much different now that we’d opened up, giving and receiving each other’s love. Nobody and nothing could take that away – not the Dukes or any distance that separated us. We had a secret knowledge that demons couldn’t fathom. They saw love as a weakness, but they were wrong. Love would keep us going. Love was our strength.
I’m woken sometime later from a vivid dream where I’m obliterating Anna’s innocence. It’s quite a nice dream, but I’d rather not be having it in public.
There was something about him that made me want to abandon all caution.
And one thing’s for certain – after tonight I’ll never look at brownies the same way again.
I am obsessed. I believe this is what they call “getting taste of one’s own medicine,” and it’s a bitter flavor.
They saw love as a weakness, but they were wrong. Love would keep us going. Love was our strength.
Fear was a dangerous, unpredictable weapon.
We’re all a bit mad at that moment, as if we’ve had loads to drink, though in fact we’re sober as nuns. I suppose that’s how rebellion feels – living with purpose – like each second is monumental and full. I soak it in, because I’m not fool enough to think it will last forever. But it’s ours now, all ours.