She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say ‘when.’
And she’s got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
Alcohol is a misunderstood vitamin.
If there is one thing I dislike, it is the man who tries to air his grievances when I wish to air mine.
Has anybody ever seen a dramatic critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.
Why don’t you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.
I hadn’t the heart to touch my breakfast. I told Jeeves to drink it himself.
I should think it extremely improbable that anyone ever wrote for money. Naturally, when he has written something, he wants to get as much for it as he can, but that is a very different thing from writing for money.
Success comes to a writer as a rule, so gradually that it is always something of a shock to him to look back and realize the heights to which he has climbed.
Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character.
I don’t know if you have had the same experience, but the snag I always come up against when I’m telling a story is this dashed difficult problem of where to begin it.
The cup of tea on arrival at a country house is a thing which, as a rule, I particularly enjoy. I like the crackling logs, the shaded lights, the scent of buttered toast, the general atmosphere of leisured cosiness.
When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon.
To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.
He was white and shaken, like a dry martini.
I suppose half the time Shakespeare just shoved down anything that came into his head.
There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea.
Boyhood, like measles, is one of those complaints which a man should catch young and have done with, for when it comes in middle life it is apt to be serious.
Golf, like measles, should be caught young.