To become more fascinating, you don’t have to change who you are. You have to become more of who you are.
Fascination takes many forms, but all tap into instinctive triggers, such as the need to hunt, to control, to feel secure, to nurture and be nurtured. Some fascinations last only a heartbeat, while others last beyond a seventy-fifth wedding anniversary.
You don’t need to find the light, you ARE the light; and when you let your personality shine you can light up the world.
Your influence is determined by your ability to get people to take action.
Today, every piece of your communication faces three enemies: distraction, competition, and commoditization.
One of the hardest tasks of leadership is understanding that you are not what you are, but what you’re perceived to be by others. – EDWARD L. FLOM.
You will never rise to your greatest potential by being all things to all people.
The reality, however, is that “better” is not better. Better is a mirage. It keeps you chained to the same way of working as your competition. Better is temporary. Better is a flimsy edge that can be toppled in a millisecond by someone with a bigger following, a lower price, a more convenient location, a fancier degree, a shinier award, a newer technology, a more skillful skill. Better is not always better. Sometimes, it’s worse.
Different is better than better. Different doesn’t try to turn you into something else. Different allows you to highlight the singular traits you already have within you. You aren’t necessarily better than your competition. But you are already different.
You will not win by being quiet. You will win by being heard.
Who you are is the greatest differentiator you’ve ever had.
An eternally favorite deadly sin, lust fascinates through experience: our appetites and passions of sight, sound, taste, touch, and scent. We anticipate what it might be like to fulfill a craving, and that anticipation pulls us closer. As early as the sixth century AD, lust emerged as public enemy number one for Christians. And not without reason. Overcoming desire is no easy task. Buddhism presents the overcoming of desire as an ideal.
Forbes describes how Daniel Kahneman, a Nobel Prize-winning psychologist, discovered that “people would rather do business with a person they like and trust rather than someone they don’t, even if the likeable person is offering a lower quality product or service at a higher price.
Your personality is your natural weapon against distraction, competition, and commoditization. The more value you add, the less you have to compete on price, and the less likely you are to become a commodity.
People don’t want to connect with brands. They want to connect with each other. Fascinating companies create more opportunities for people to connect with each other, through the brand.
Throughout your career, you will compete against people who are more established, more famous, more connected, more specialized. But they can’t be you. They can’t capture your highest distinct value. Only you have you.
Fascination is not the same as interest. It’s a neurological state of intense focus, one that creates an irresistible feeling of engagement.
I’ll do the black magic. Then, I’ll hand you the wand.
If you don’t have the biggest budget, then be the most fascinating.
Competition might motivate you at first, urging you to expend more dollars and energy to win. But if competition leads you down the wrong path, you’ll be stuck playing someone else’s game.