I think clothes should make you feel safe. I like clothes you want to go to sleep in. I sometimes stand in front of a mirror and change a million times because I know I really want to wear my nightgown.
I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch.
Having cancer gave me membership in an elite club I’d rather not belong to.
I’d much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, they can wear cute clothes, and they’re the first to be rescued off sinking ships.
I can always be distracted by love, but eventually I get horny for my creativity.
I would rather be funny than gorgeous, absolutely. Because it’s too hard to be gorgeous, you know. I could make a stab at gorgeous as long as I had something funny to say to get out of it.
You feel completely in control when you hear a wave of laughter coming back at you that you have caused.
Dreams are like paper, they tear so easily.
I love being a woman. You can cry. You get to wear pants now. If you’re on a boat and it’s going to sink, you get to go on the rescue boat first. You get to wear cute clothes. It must be a great thing, or so many men wouldn’t be wanting to do it.
Adopted kids are such a pain – you have to teach them how to look like you.
I grew up in front of a television. I guess I’ll grow old inside of one.
Comedy is very controlling – you are making people laugh.
I have always found men who were funny, irresistible. It’s rare that I ever based love on looks or superficial things, but it a guy made me laugh-and that didn’t mean he had to be in comedy professionally – I was hooked.
I would say that Lucy, ‘I Love Lucy,’ she was my idol.
Humor is just truth, only faster!
Fame changes a lot of things, but it can’t change a light bulb.
Show business is like riding a bicycle – when you fall off, the best thing to do is get up, brush yourself off and get back on again.
It’s always something.
I’m not really an impersonator.
Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end.