It’s silly that anyone in this world tells you that there are only certain people that can marry you.
In the face of such hopelessness as our eventual, unavoidable death, there is little sense in not at least trying to accomplish all of your wildest dreams in life.
We love dirty oral on the Down Low, but no going steady.
People tend to romanticize this job. So, it’s fun to let the air out of it.
I’m always cribbing from real life. I’m not a very creative filmmaker.
I’m not even supposed to be here today.
I think the advent of the Internet gave us all a big boost, because by the time the Internet became mainstream and you could get it in your home, a lot of us were used to dealing in fan culture, writing to magazines or anything at the back of comic books.
It takes nothing to encourage an artist.
I’ve always kind of ripped from real life to some degree or at least how I’m feeling in the moment. In fact, maybe that’s really it. In anything I’ve ever written, all the characters sound like me, which I don’t think is a bad thing.
Indie film isn’t dead, it just grew up.
One man’s frankness is another man’s vulgarity.
If there was no Internet, my career would have ended in 1995.
I always wanted to see if I could sell a movie to the public without doing any marketing because my philosophy was like, ‘Hey man, I’m reaching my audience everyday. I’m twittering with them. I’m in direct contact with them on the podcast.’
People have been telling me I’m a failure and that I’m doing it all wrong for 20 years now. Never trust anybody when they tell you how your story goes. You know your story. You write your own story.
In Hollywood you kind of fail upwards.
Batman has an impeccable moral compass, he’s clever and mysterious, and when fucktards get sassy, he punches them in the face.
Don’t be afraid to do weird stuff, so long as you do it cheaply and cover everyone’s bets. Be bold. Be stupid, if you have to: so long as you don’t hurt anybody, what’s it matter how dopey your dream is? If I hadn’t made TUSK? If I’d let it die as a podcast? I wouldn’t have three other movies I’m now making within the span of a year. Some folks will try to shame you for trying something outside the norm; the only shame is in not trying to accomplish your dreams.
Happiness can’t be bottled. It can’t be smoked, swallowed, shot or ejaculated. And there is no end game: you never cross the finish line and are suddenly happy. Even when all your wildest dreams come true, you still pursue happiness.
My American Dream has always been simple, and it’s one I encourage you to adopt as your own: Figure out what you love to do, then figure out how to get paid to do it.
Life is also, as George Carlin taught us, a zero-sum game. We all lose in the end. We all die screaming. If that’s the case, we might as well make for ourselves a paradise in this world. Make yourself happy and comfortable as often as you can, because sooner or later, the infinite hands you a bill for all these goods and services. What.
I don’t hate you ’cause I’m crazy... I’m crazy ’cause I hate you.