Live Another Sol would be an awesome name for a James Bond movie.
I’m getting pretty good at this. Maybe when all this is over I could be a product tester for Mars rovers.
As usual, I’m working with stuff that was deliberately designed not to burn. But no amount of careful design by NASA can get around a determined arsonist with a tank of pure oxygen.
Blissfull unconsiousness became foggy awareness which transitioned into painful reality.
Well, it is a photo taken from orbit,” Mindy said. “The NSA enhanced the image with the best software they have.” “Wait, what?” Venkat stammered. “The NSA?” “Yeah, they called and offered to help out.
Life is amazingly tenacious. They don’t want to die any more than I do.
The planet’s famous red color is from iron oxide coating everything. So it’s not just a desert. It’s a desert so old it’s literally rusting.
I don’t want to come off as arrogant here, but I’m the best botanist on the planet.
Human beings have a remarkable ability to accept the abnormal and make it normal.
You know what? “Kilowatt-hour per sol” is a pain in the ass to say. I’m gonna invent a new scientific unit name. One kilowatt-hour per sol is... it can be anything... um... I suck at this... I’ll call it a “pirate-ninja”.
Things didn’t go exactly as planned, but I’m not dead, so it’s a win.
I tested the brackets by hitting them with rocks. This kind of sophistication is what we interplanetary scientists are known for.
Grumpy. Angry. Stupid. How long since last sleep, question?
Once again I’m struck by melancholy. I want to spend the rest of my life studying Eridian biology! But I have to save humanity first. Stupid humanity. Getting in the way of my hobbies.
On a scale from one to ‘invade Russia in winter,’ how stupid is this plan?
I’ll spend the rest of the evening enjoying a potato. And by “enjoying” I mean “hating so much I want to kill people.
Good. Proud. I am scary space monster. You are leaky space blob.” He points to the breeder tanks. “Check tanks!
It’s a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I’m the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn’t moved in a million years! I’m the first guy to drive long-distance on Mars. The first guy to spend more than thirty-one sols on Mars. The first guy to grow crops on Mars. First, first, first!
We’re as smart as evolution made us. So we’re the minimum intelligence needed to ensure we can dominate our planets.
You may be wondering what else I do with my free time. I spend a lot of it sitting around on my lazy ass watching TV. But also do you, so don’t judge.