Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.
I can see it, Ed, I leaned deeper into you, felt you nodding along with the sounds in the room, and your warmth signaled through to me from under your shirt, lovely strong, safe and right.
I can’t imagine why you would want to take your child to see what the career of a writer is like, because it mostly consists of sitting in a room typing, or going to the library and looking something up. Those are not exciting things to watch.
To stutter through it with you or even stop stuttering and say nothing, was so lucky and soft, better talk than mile-a-minute with anyone. After a few minutes we’d stop rattling, we’d adjust, we’d settle in, and the conversation would speed into the night.
I liked, I admit, that we didn’t pretend there hadn’t been other girls. There was always a girl on you in the halls at school, like they came free with a backpack.
There are two types of panicking: standing still and not saying a word, and leaping all over the place babbling anything that comes into your head.
Occasionally there are parents who say, “I brought my child so he or she could learn what the career of a writer is like, and you did this long theatrical performance instead, and I’m very disappointed.”
I stand entwined in fire on the inextinguishable bonfire of inconceivable love.
Accidents happen all the time.
I didn’t realize this was a sad occasion.
I was once almost forced off the stage at a large chain bookstore that shall remain nameless, because she introduced me as Lemony Snicket, and I immediately interrupted her and said, “Oh no, Lemony Snicket isn’t here,” and then she tried to cancel the event right then and there.
Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something.
At times the world may seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough, and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey.
Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.
There is no worse sound in the world than someone who cannot play the violin but insists on doing so anyway.
Is it useful to feel fear, because it prepares you for nasty events, or is it useless, because nasty events will occur whether you are frightened or not?
When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them.
If I were to say, “Yes, I am a fascinating, erudite person,” what would that say about me? I don’t know.
Everyone tells you it’s all right to cry, but not enough people say it’s all right if you don’t want people to know.
Just about everybody has written a first novel that they throw away before writing their actual first novel.