Pictures can be pretty deceptive.
Willem, I suspect deep down you know exactly why you’re here, exactly what you want, but you’re unwilling to the wanting, let alone the having. Because both of those propositions are terrifying.
Once the options increase, settling on one becomes harder.
When you make such a large withdrawal of happiness, somewhere you’ll have to make an equally large deposit. It all goes back to the universal law of equilibrium.
Because for that day, I really did become Lulu. Maybe not from the film or the real Louise Brooks, but my own idea of what Lulu represented. Freedom. Daring. Adventure. Saying yes.
But it’s a big ocean. It’s an even bigger world. And maybe we’ve gotten as close as we’re supposed to get.
By that point, it’ll have been more than year since I met Lulu. Any sane person would say it’s too late. It already felt too late that first day, when I woke up in the hospital. But even so, I’ve kept looking. I’m still looking.
Nothing happens without intention, Willem. Nothing. This theory of yours – life is rules by accidents – isn’t that just one huge excuse for passivity?
It’s just accidental, just temporary. Until the next accident sends me somewhere new. That’s how life works.
Can you move on from something when you’re not sure what it is you’re moving on from?
You just work through it. You just hang in there.
Hate me. Devastate me. Annihilate me. Re-create me. Re-create me. Won’t you, won’t you won’t you re-create me.
Barrel of the gun, rounds one two three She says I have to pick: choose you, or choose me Metal to the temple, the explosion is deafening Lick the blood that covers me She’s the last one standing “Roulette” Collateral Damage, Track 11.
That’s the thing you never expect about grieving, what a competition it is.
What’s that sound I hear? It’s just my lifetime It’s whistling past my ear.
You stood over me and you made a promise to me, as sacred as any vow. And I can understand why you’re angry, but you can’t blame me. You can’t hate me for taking your word.
She said if she couldn’t play, she had nothing left. What about me?
Really? Was that how you quit me?
How is it possible that a boyfriend ceases to exist from one day to another?
I think everything is happening all the time, but if you don’t put yourself in the path of it, you miss it.