You can’t know, sweetie, because you’ve never had a baby become a brilliant young reader with a side interest in horrible television shows, but the joy you bring us is so much greater than the sadness we feel about your illness.
I can’t be mad at you, you harmless scrawny bastard.
I never liked writing concluding paragraphs to papers – where you repeat what you’ve already said with phrases like ‘In summation’, and ‘To conclude’.
I mean, it’s stupid to miss someone you didn’t even get along with. But I don’t know, it was nice, you know, having someone you could always fight with.
I fear oblivion. I fear it like the proverbial blind man who’s afraid of the dark.
I spy with my little eye a great story.
As a child I was an inveterate liar. As opposed to now, I am a Novelist.
Just remember that sometimes, the way you think about a person isn’t the way they actually are.
I don’t know why boys expect us to like boy movies. We don’t expect them to like girl movies.
Chuck Parson did not participate in organized sports, because to do so would distract from his larger goal of his life: to one day be convicted of murder.
How strange and how lovely it is to be anything at all.
It lit up like a Christmas Tree Hazel Grace...
Take a picture of this so Isaac can see it when they invent robot eyes.
No headboards were broken.
Right, well, he’d been sick for a while and his nurse said to him, ‘You seem to be feeling better this morning,’ and Isben looked at her and said, ‘On the contrary,’ and then he died.
On the morning in question, she wore white shorts and a pink T-shirt that featured a green dragon breathing a fire of orange glitter. It is difficult to explain how awesome I found this T-shirt at the time.
Of course I tensed up when he touched me. To be with him was to hurt him-inevitably. And that’s what I’d felt as he reached for me: I’d felt as though I were committing an act of violence against him, because I was.
Getting you a date to prom is so hard that the hypothetical idea itself is used to cut diamonds.
The worse the haircut, the better the man.
Use your words.