Athletes become our heroes, because they’re superhuman. They do things nobody else can do. They’re better than 6 billion other people.
What they’re not ready for is guys like you and I and Nails and all the other gnarly gnarlingtons in my life, that we are high priests, Vatican assassin warlocks. Boom. Print that, people. See where that goes.
It’s perfect. It’s awesome. Every day is just filled with just wins. All we do is put wins in the record books. We win so radically in our underwear before our first cup of coffee, it’s scary. People say it’s lonely at the top, but I sure like the view.
They sell pot named after me in the dispensaries. And I’m not even a pot guy. I was so honored.
I am on a drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen.
If you love with violence and you hate with violence there is nothing that can be questioned.
Shut your evil mucus-hole you truth terrorist. You LOSE every time a mirror implodes from your barbed and gristle image.
I’m not in any way religious. I don’t go to church, but I consider myself spiritual.
Let’s hook up and just bring fiery death.
The last time I took drugs, I probably took more than anybody could survive.
Dad kept us out of school, but school comes and goes. Family is forever.
I refuse to grow up. I won’t become the adult guy.
I’m grandiose because I live a grandiose life.
I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry at my fingertips.
The truth is for suckers, Johnny Boy!
You can put people’s feet to the fire a bit just by reminding them that we’re constantly creating our own history.
I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time – and this includes naps – I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.
I’m an F-18, bro, and I will destroy you in the air and deploy my ordnance to the ground.
I was banging seven-gram rocks, because that’s how I roll. I have one speed, I have one gear: Go.
You should have read the directions before you showed up to the party.