I believe that at birth everyone gets the capacity for a certain amount of drugs and alcohol, everyone the same, you can do it all between 15 and 19 like I did, or you can stretch it out over 70 years.
You’re only as good as your last haircut.
Contrary to popular opinion, the hustle is not a new dance step – it is an old business procedure.
The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to offer them a drink.
I drank my lifetime supply of alcohol and I took my lifetime supply of drugs between the ages of 15 and 19.
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine.
To put it rather bluntly, I am not the type who wants to go back to the land; I am the type who wants to go back to the hotel.
I stopped taking drugs when I was 19, and who wants to drive a cab around New York with drugs in their car?
Violet will be a good color for hair at just about the same time that brunette becomes a good color for flowers.
I must take issue with the term ‘a mere child,’ for it has been my invariable experience that the company of a mere child is infinitely preferable to that of a mere adult.
As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
Because I was young, I had this long hair, and people used to try to tip me with joints.
Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it off successfully.
Luckily when you drive a cab there are two things: You don’t have a boss in the cab with you, and you are not facing the people that you are making money from.
Generally speaking, the poorer person summers where he winters.
Presently it appears that people are mainly concerned with being well rested. Those capable of uninterrupted sleep are much admired. Unconsciousness is in great demand. This is the day of the milligram.
Magazines all too frequently lead to books and should be regarded by the prudent as the heavy petting of literature.
Breakfast cereals that come in the same colors as polyester leisure suits make oversleeping a virtue.
If food did not exist it would be well-nigh impossible to get certain types off the phone, as one would be unable to say, ‘Look, I’ve got to run but let’s have dinner sometime soon.’
I hate writing. I will do anything to avoid it. The only way I could write less was if I was dead.