Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.
I just can’t smile at people for money.
Sleep is death without the responsibility.
If you read a lot, nothing is as great as you’ve imagined. Venice is – Venice is better.
If you feel the urge to write, just lie down and read a book: it will pass.
I drove a cab. But all the girls I knew when I was young who had to work – there were rich girls – but the ones who had to work were waitresses. Because you could always get shifts in a restaurant.
My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as restaurants, airports, streets, hotel lobbies, parks, and department stores. Verbal exchanges between consenting adults in private are as of little interest to me as they probably are to them.
Humility is no substitute for a good personality.
Polite conversation is rarely either.
There were a zillion bad jobs. That doesn’t exist any more. I mean, I could wake up one afternoon with zero money and know that by the end of the day, I would have money.
If you are truly serious abut preparing your child for the future, don’t teach him to subtract teach him to deduct.
If you’re going to America, bring your own food.
Civilised adults do not take apple juice with dinner.
Your life story would not make a good book. Don’t even try.
Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
All God’s children are not beautiful. Most of God’s children are, in fact, barely presentable.
No one I knew talked about money. It’s not an area of interest.
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.
Now the culture is made of old things, it’s a collage. Art made out of art is not art. You’re supposed to make art out of life.