Seasickness: at first you are so sick you are afraid you will die, and then you are so sick you are afraid you won’t die.
Reputation is a hall-mark: it can remove doubt from pure silver, and it can also make the plated article pass for pure.
Our consciences take no notice of pain inflicted on others until it reaches a point where it gives pain to us.
One of my theories is that the hearts of men are about alike, no matter what their skin color.
No one is willing to acknowledge a fault in himself when a more agreeable motive can be found for the estrangement of his acquaintances.
Never waste a lie; you never know when you may need it.
In writing, I shall always confine myself strictly to the truth, except when it is attended with inconvenience.
In all my travels the thing that has impressed me the most is the universal brotherhood of man-what there is of it.
I like criticism, but it must be my way.
Half of the results of a good intentions are evil; half the results of an evil intention are good.
Great enterprises usually promise vastly more than they perform.
Every time I reform in one direction I go overboard in another.
Beautiful credit! The foundation of modern society.
Adam was the author of sin, and I wish he had taken out an international copyright on it.
A historian who would convey the truth has got to lie. Often he must enlarge the truth by diameters, otherwise his reader would not be able to see it.
A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.
All religions issue bibles again Satan, and say the most injurious things against him, but we never hear his side.
Do good when you can, and charge when you think they will stand it.
It is sound statesmanship to add two battleships every time our neighbour adds one and two stories to our skyscrapers every time he piles a new one on top of his to threaten our light. There is no limit to this soundness but the sky.
Senator: Person who makes laws in Washington when not doing time.