Sometimes what you want is right in front of you. All you have to do is open your eyes and see it.
I needed another soda. I’d only had six since breakfast.
I lay there in my black slip dress and wondered if I ought to have worn pants. I mean, who knew what I was going to find up there? What if I had to do some climbing? People might see my underwear.
I wonder what it’s like to live in Tinaville. I get the feeling it’s very shiny there.
I mean it. Like, people always talk about how God doesn’t ever give you more than you can handle, but I’m telling you right now, I cannot handle this. This is just too much!
But I had loved him. A part of me still did. Maybe more than a part of me, because I’m a complete moron.
But if that was really true, why in the name of all that is holy would anyone have ever liked Nikki in the first place? I was becoming more and more convinced she was a cross between Heidi Montag and Hitler.
But I don’t care what Megan Fox or Jessica Biel say: There are definite advantages to being the hottest girl on the planet. Number one was that I got paid for it. A lot.
Honey, some boys stopped by to see you. They had wood.
What did that mean? Where could it go? He was a death diety. I was a high school senior.
You know in sixth grade, when they made all of us girls go into this other room and watch a video about getting our periods and stuff? I bet while we were gone, the boys were watching a video about how to look at each other in that infuriating way.
No. The answer was no, I was not all right. I nearly got knocked out. Knocked out by desire! Desire for forbidden dissimilar molecules.
It’s kind of depressing, if you think about it. I mean, me being so young, and yet so cynical and suspicious.
Lana looked at me like I’d just said I’d never watched Bring It On, or something.
This was very exciting. I’d never had two boys get into a fight over me before. The fact that one of the boys was my stepbrother, however, and held about as much romantic appeal for me as Max, the family dog, somewhat dampened my enthusiasm. And Michael wasn’t much of a catch, either, when you actually thought about it, being a potential murderer and all. Oh, why did I have to have such a couple of losers fighting over me? Why couldn’t Matt Damon and Ben Affleck fight over me? Now that would be truly excellent.
I’ve never enjoyed myself more than I have the past forty-eight hours, during which I’ve been trapped in a car with one of the worst drivers I’ve ever seen, run up the Spanish Steps and then down again so I could be on time to wait in line to perjuer myself at the American consulate. And I’d like to continue doing those sorts of thing with you on a regular basis for the foreseeable future.
Well!” the woman cried, offended. “See if I ever come to visit Genovia!” “No one wants you there,” Lars informed her.
I’m completely demanding an autopsy on my grandmother’s brain when she’s dead so I can see what I’m in for as I age.
Michael and I are an anomaly. Hardly anyone stays together forever with their first significant other, except maybe in YA novels. And usually when they do, it’s because he’s a vampire or a werewolf or owns a beautiful estate called Pemberley or something.
But Mom’s been depressed ever since her last boyfriend turned out to be a Republican.