There is a note in the front of the volume saying that no public reading may be given without first getting the author’s permission. It ought to be made much more difficult to do than that.
Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did.
Who said time machines haven’t been built yet? They already exist. They’re called books.
There is no such place as Budapest. Perhaps you are thinking of Bucharest, and there is no such place as Bucharest, either.
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him. That remark in itself wouldn’t make any sense if quoted as it stands.
It is one of the most discouraging experiences I have ever had, not forgetting the time when I winked at the Queen Mother in London once.
The pencil sharpener is about as far as I have ever got in operating a complicated piece of machinery with any success.
Great literature must spring from an upheaval in the author’s soul. If that upheaval is not present then it must come from the works of any other author which happens to be handy and easily adapted.
If you think that you have caught a cold, call in a good doctor. Call in three good doctors and play bridge.
It has always seemed to me that the most difficult part of building a bridge would be the start.
I haven’t been abroad in so long that I almost speak English without an accent now.
Next to a shot of some good, habit-forming narcotic, there is nothing like travelling alone as a ’builder-upper.
I never liked bananas much anyway. Two-thirds of the way down even one banana I am willing to concede defeat smilingly and give the rest to the nearest monkey.
There seems to be a common strain of miserliness in the American people when it comes to throwing away toothpaste tubes which havea little left in the bottom.
Sheer madness is, of course, the highest possible brow in humor.
The Ultimate Day really begins the night before, when you sit up until one o’clock trying to get things into trunk and bags. This is when you discover the well-known fact that summer air swells articles to twice or three times their original size.
I once heard a woman laugh at that most tragic moment in all drama, the off-stage shot in “The Wild Duck,” and I afterward had her killed, so there will be no more of that out of her.
But compared with the task of selecting a piece of French pastry held by an impatient waiter a move in chess is like reaching for a salary check in its demand on the contemplative faculties.
Streets full of water. Please Advise.
One cubic foot less of space and it would have constituted adultery.