Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.
I would assign every lie a color: yellow when they were innocent, pale blue when they sailed over you like the sky, red because I knew they drew blood. And then there was the black lie. That’s the worst of all. A black lie was when I told you the truth.
I’ve got to keep breathing. It’ll be my worst business mistake if I don’t.
The operation was a success, but I’m afraid the doctor is dead.
Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.
Or is it that I think too much?
Be undeniably good.
Lord loves a workin’ man; don’t trust whitey.
So she viewed time spent in the land of the normal as an investigation into the world of marriage-worthy men, even if she was unsure about her own interest in marriage. There must be one solid citizen who also had a spark of life, a sense of humor and adventure.
It’s so beautiful where I am today that it makes me wonder where I am.
A triangle with four points is what Euclid rides into hell.
There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
Through the years, I have learned there is no harm in charging oneself up with delusions between moments of valid inspiration.
I was always very shy but as I get older I think, What am I being shy for? You just grow weary of your own hang-ups.
She had destroyed whatever was between us by making a profound gaffe: She met me.
Knowledge of means without knowledge of ends is animal training.
I’ve always believed that there are funny people everywhere, but they’re just not comedians. In fact, some of my best comedic inspirations were not professional entertainers.
I’m always looking for something to engage my imagination and take me on a little mental voyage. I just want a new topic in my life.