If I weren’t in Radiohead I’d be working at a grocery store, I’d be that creepy guy who lives in an efficiency apartment and collects salted, cured meats.
I once wrote a song so beautiful that I myself couldn’t sing it. It’s called Plastic Government Cheese Swan, and it’s about how the world is plastic and full of government cheese swans.
If I were a bottle of wine, my name would be Thom Cork.
I’m Chris Martin with down syndrome.
Treefingers is important, it’s the point in which our protagonist crosses the icy tundra that is how to disappear completely to reach the island of Optimistic. But seriously, kill yourself.
It turns out I have clinical schizophrenia. The unborn chicken voices were telling me to kill my family.
Technology is killing us. We think it’s helping us but it’s killing us. Don’t ask me why because I don’t have the time or the attention span to complete that thought. Now let’s all hold hands and draw spider monkeys.
It’s not so much that I’m an atheist so much as the sneaking suspicion that I myself may be god.
My nickname in high school was jack-o-lantern because I’m missing 9 teeth.
I’ve tried crowd surfing but the radiating light that surrounds me kept sending me floating into the heavens. Goddamn I’m beautiful.
Look at that fat kid, in the audience. You want some pie you little fatty? I strongly dislike fat kids. Security, please remove him, that fat kid, over there, by the pies.
Are you feeling lucky? Cause I’m on a roll.
If I could do just one thing to change the world, I’d make everyone Thom Yorke, and this would be paradise.
I think no artist can claim to have any access to the truth, or an authentic version of an event. But obviously they have slightly better means at their disposal because they have their art to energize whatever it is they’re trying to write about. They have music.
I agree with whoever said Spice Girls are soft port. They’re the antichrist.
I would rather die then let my kids eat cup a soup.
I don’t like old friends talking to me like I’m a pop star, cos it makes me feel like I’m becoming two-dimensional.
I’ve never believed that pop music is escapist trash. There’s always a darkness in it, even amidst great pop music.
I’m the Legendary Radio Head.
I’m not taking things quite so seriously as before. Especially myself.