Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil!
PIE, n. An advance agent of the reaper whose name is Indigestion.
PITIFUL, adj. The state of an enemy or opponent after an imaginary encounter with oneself.
In this world one must have a name; it prevents confusion, even when it does not establish identity. Some, though, are known by numbers, which also seem inadequate distinctions.
Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.
Rome has seven sacraments, but the Protestant churches, being less prosperous, feel that they can afford only two, and these of inferior sanctity.
TRICHINOSIS, n. The pig’s reply to proponents of porcophagy.
TEETOTALER, n. One who abstains from strong drink, sometimes totally, sometimes tolerably totally.
TABLE D’HOTE, n. A caterer’s thrifty concession to the universal passion for irresponsibility.
Rhubarb: essence of stomach ache.
Convictions are variable; to be always consistent is to be sometimes dishonest.
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
A cheap and easy cynicism rails at everything. The master of the art accomplishes the formidable task of discrimination.
Youth looks forward, for nothing is behind! Age backward, for nothing is before.
CLOSE-FISTED, adj. Unduly desirous of keeping that which many meritorious persons wish to obtain.
GUNPOWDER, n. An agency employed by civilized nations for the settlement of disputes which might become troublesome if left unadjusted.
OVATION, n. n ancient Rome, a definite, formal pageant in honor of one who had been disserviceable to the enemies of the nation. A lesser “triumph.”
Truth is more deceptive than falsehood, for it is more frequently presented by those from whom we do not expect it, and so has against it a numerical presumption.
When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register.
When lost in a forest go always down hill. When lost in a philosophy or doctrine go upward.