I always want to look unattractive, it’s more fun. I like playing opposites, people who aren’t attractive who think they are pretty. That’s always interesting to me.
I swear I want to be a food model.
Well I went to New Orleans to cover the jazz festival for Trio, it’s this new arts channel, it’s really great.
I love old cookbooks. I just got such a kick out of them, how the color would be way off or fake looking. The cook books now look so much like magazines, you’ll never make food that looks like that. I’d rather see it the ugly way than they way they do it now.
If I put my mind to something, it happens. I do know that’s not necessarily psychic. But I always feel like there’s something around me protecting me.
You think in a different way when you don’t have any money. The joy of poverty is that you use your imagination to come up with stuff.
When I’m by myself, I never play music. I have a lot of it, for a girl, but I don’t listen to it a lot. I hate picking music out; I’m not good at it.
I don’t really consider myself to be a comedian. I mean, it’s not like I’m sitting around writing jokes or anything. I just like dressing up and pretending to be other people.
I have a lot of fake food in my apartment, but I’m picky about it. Old plaster food, like from the ’50s is really nice, hollowed out paper-mache food from old plays – the new stuff just looks too good.
I want witchcraft so bad that I can’t stand it. I have wands in my apartment. And I use them sometimes. I walk into the kitchen with my wand, and I come out with something on a platter and I say, ‘See, magic happens.’ Works every time.
I like to be the one in charge of everything.
When people tell me they are going to go scrapbooking, I say, ‘Why don’t you make it yourself.’ It’s like chocolate-chip cookies. People buy the cookie-dough roll and slice it, and then they lay it on a cookie sheet. That’s not making chocolate-chip cookies.
On the off chance that you have children, don’t clean up at all. As children, my brother and sister and I loved waking up early and playing cocktail party with the leftover debris.
I like it when people who aren’t so attractive, or they have a whole lot of hurdles to get over, I like it when they dress up and they look presentable. That, to me, just touches me.
Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener’s ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.
My characters always like themselves.
I’m not a first-place person.
All my muscles are in my face. I have a very muscular face. I’m good with faces. I always have been.
There’s humor in everything. There’s gotta be humor in everything.
Books are challenging and inspirational to me.