If Hitler hadn’t turned against their beloved Stalin, liberals would have stuck by him, too.
They’re Democrats always accusing us of repressing their speech. I say let’s do it. Let’s repress them. Frankly, I’m not a big fan of the First Amendment.
You don’t want the Republicans in power, does that mean you want a dictatorship, gay boy?
In the spirit of reaching across the aisle, we owe it to the Democrats to show their president the exact same kind of respect and loyalty that they have shown our recent Republican president.
When Minutemen leader Jim Gilchrist and his black colleague Marvin Stewart were invited by the College Republicans to speak at Columbia last year, the tolerant, free-speech-loving Columbia students violently attacked them, shutting down the speech.
Public school teachers are the new priesthood while traditional religion is ridiculed and maligned.
The media will spend weeks going through pay stubs for Bush’s National Guard service in Alabama in the waning days of war, but if Kerry tells them exotic tales of covert missions into Cambodia directed by Richard Nixon, they don’t even bother to fact-check who was president in December 1968.
Our gays are more macho than their straights.
They spent the night in jail, where their progressive views on gay marriage served them well.
We don’t want someone who will get 98 percent of the vote. We want someone who will get 51 percent of the vote.
The only subject fewer authentic Americans cared about than the treatment of prisoners at Guantanamo was World Cup Soccer. America is an epic global battle with ruthless savages who seek our destruction, and liberals are feeling sorry for the terrorists.
If you want to find the cool, anti-establishment rebels who don’t answer to The Man on college campuses today, you have to go to a meeting of the College Republicans. They are rebelling against at least 99 percent of their professors.
Once man’s connection to the divine is denied, you can reason yourself from here to anywhere.
Liberals don’t mind discussing who is more patriotic if patriotism is defined as redistributing income and vetoing the Pledge of Allegiance. Only if patriotism is defined as supporting America do they get testy and drone on about ‘McCarthyism.’
The idea of a bowed and terrified liberal minority during McCarthy’s ‘reign of terror’ is poppycock. Then as now, all elite opinion was against McCarthy.
In the very next election, the American people elected 63 new Republicans to the House of Representatives – the largest sweep of Congress for any party since 1948. Even liberal Massachusetts elected a Republican senator solely because of his vow to vote against Obamacare.
If we’re so cruel to minorities, why do they keep coming here? Why aren’t they sneaking across the Mexican border to make their way to the Taliban?
The beauty of being a liberal is that history always begins this morning. Every day liberals can create a new narrative that destroys the past as it occurred. We have always been at war with Eastasia.
Democrats couldn’t care less if people in Indiana hate them. But if Europeans curl their lips, liberals can’t look at themselves in the mirror.
As far as I’m concerned, I’m a middle-of-the-road moderate and the rest of you are crazy.