Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing wrong with this, except that it ain’t so.
No sinner is ever saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon.
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.
The human race is a race of cowards; and I am not only marching in that procession but carrying a banner.
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run.
The Public is merely a multiplied ‘me.’
The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.
Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
Peace by persuasion has a pleasant sound, but I think we should not be able to work it. We should have to tame the human race first, and history seems to show that that cannot be done.
To place man properly at the present time, he stands somewhere between the angels and the French.
Human pride is not worthwhile; there is always something lying in wait to take the wind out of it.
Steal a chicken if you get a chance, Huck, because if you don’t want it, someone else does and a good deed ain’t never forgotten.
To be, or not to be; that is the bare bodkin That makes calamity of so long life;.
It is sound judgment to put on a bold face and play your hand for a hundred times what it is worth; forty-nine times out of fifty nobody dares to call it, and you roll in the chips.
You have heretofore found out, by my teachings, that man is a fool; you are now aware that woman is a damned fool.
If everyone was satisfied with himself, there would be no heroes.
I don’t want no better book than what your face is.
I do not like an injurious lie, except when it injures somebody else.