Work to make a living; serve to make a life.
In politics practically everything you hear is scandal, and besides, the funny thing is that the things they are whispering ain’t half has bad as the things they have been saying right out loud.
If you let women have their way, you will generally get even with them in the end.
Congress is going to start tinkering with the Ten Commandments just as soon as they find someone in Washington who has read them.
A holding company is the people you give your money to while you’re being searched.
What’s considered enough money? Just a little bit more.
If you are trying to get out of the hole, stop digging.
It’s the fellow who knows when to quit that the audience wants more of.
People learn more from observation that they do from conversation.
Some say, what is the Salvation of the Movies? I say, run ’em backwards. It can’t hurt ’em and it’s worth a trial.
The budget is like a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, then reaches in and tries to pull real ones out.
The fellow that can only see a week ahead is always the popular fellow, for he is looking with the crowd. But the one that can see years ahead, he has a telescope but he can’t make anybody believe that he has it.
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
The United States never lost a war or won a conference.
When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that’s Memoirs.
Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.
With Congress, every time they make a joke it’s a law, and every time they make a law it’s a joke.
I never met a man that I didn’t like.
I’ll bet you the time ain’t far off when a woman won’t know any more than a man.
Give her a day, and then in return Momma gives you the other 364.