Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
To the eye of failure success is an accident.
TARIFF, n. A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer.
Pantheism, n. The doctrine that everything is God, in contradistinction to the doctrine that God is everything.
A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.
Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.
UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.
Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.
Enthusiasm – a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.
Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.
The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous of nations.
IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
MUSTANG, n. An indocile horse of the western plains. In English society, the American wife of an English nobleman.
Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
Feast, n. A festival. A religious celebration usually signalized by gluttony and drunkenness, frequently in honor of some holy person distinguished for abstemiousness.
Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one’s bread to determine which side it is buttered on.
Liberty: One of Imagination’s most precious possessions.
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.