Why aren’t you more grateful when I prove how wrong you’ve been?
The information I most want is in books not yet written by people not yet born.
Don’t call it freedom, unless it includes the freedom to be absolutely disgusting.
Beware! Freedom of speech also includes the freedom to be misunderstood.
If you value your safety, avoid holy places founded in the name of peace and brotherhood.
We owe it to our past futile sacrifices to continue making further futile sacrifices.
We must have courage, faith, and lunch together sometime soon.
In order to keep an open mind, I am trying to avoid learning anything.
If I didn’t have most of my friends, I wouldn’t have most of my problems.
What’s most interesting about some books is the question: How did this crap ever get published?
Don’t wait for a disaster to get to know your neighbors.
Love is a strange commodity, because you can’t import it if you don’t also export it.
If I can survive death, I can probably survive anything.
The trouble is that sex is a force of nature, and reason is not.
How can I be sure I’ve succeeded, if I can’t remember what I was trying to do.
Life is the only game in which the object of the game is to learn the rules.
What we really need is to realize how little we really need.
Why does life keep teaching me lessons I have no desire to learn?
I could live a better life if I had a better mind and a better body.
I want to appreciate you now, and avoid the rush.