There is no sweeter sound than the crumbling of one’s fellow man.
Mrs. Teasdale calls for rescue and Firefly delivers the famous line to his cohorts as they rescue her: “Remember, you’re fighting for this woman’s honor, which is probably more than she ever did.”
I came here for a party and what do I get? Nothing. Not even Ice cream.
That’s nothing. My alarm clock is set for eight.
I don’t have change I’d have to give you nine more books.
Ice Water? Get some Onions – that’ll make your eyes water!
If it gets any hotter in here I could use a big fan.
Don’t ever underestimate the importance of money. I know it’s often been said that money won’t make you happy and this is undeniably true, but everything else being equal, it’s a lovely thing to have around the house.
I eat like a vulture. Unfortunately the resemblance doesn’t end there.
I was so long writing my review that I never got around to reading the book.
I wish you’d keep my hands to yourself.
If they’d lower the taxes and get rid of the smog and clean up the traffic mess, I really believe I’d settle here until the next earthquake.
There’s a man outside with a big black mustache. – Tell him I’ve got one.
I’m going to Iowa for an award. Then I’m appearing at Carnegie Hall, it’s sold out. Then I’m sailing to France to be honored by the French government – I’d give it all up for one erection.
Making love to your wife is like shooting at sitting ducks.
The admission fee was a viper’s tongue and a half-concealed stiletto. It was a sort of intellectual slaughterhouse.
Humor is reason gone mad.
My favourite poem is the one that starts ‘Thirty days hath September’ because it actually tells you something.
Marry me and I’ll never look at another horse!
It isn’t necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.