In ten Muslim countries you can get the death penalty just for being gay. If they were chopping the heads off of gay people in the Vatican, wouldn’t there be a greater outcry among liberals?
In Europe, Socialism is just another political party. It just means that government takes over certain things like hospitals, prisons, military and schools that should not be run for profit.
I don’t know anyone less Jesus like than Christians.
I’m not a joiner. I don’t like organizations.
The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.
Halloween is a day when we all get to fool people into thinking we’re someone else. Or as Mitt Romney calls it, campaigning.
I don’t want to start a movement that mirrors religion. I don’t want to create the church of the non-believers where I’m the preacher and we’re all gathering together and reciting things.
You’re not a patriot unless even when you lose, it’s still your country.
Men are only as loyal as their options.
Democrats are afraid of polls. Republicans aren’t afraid of polls. Republicans make polls. Democrats run from polls.
The plain fact is: religion must die for mankind to live.
The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.
I’m for the death penalty, I’m pro-abortion, I’m pro-assisted suicide, I’m pro-regular suicide. Anything that’ll get the traffic moving.
People are very narcissistic. It’s not all their fault. We live in a society where there is a magazine for you, a channel for you, a perfume for you.
Denying racism is the new racism.
Sam Harris made that great analogy. He said, ‘If someone was talking into their hair dryer and claiming that they were speaking to God, they would call Bellevue. But, take away the hair dryer, it’s just praying.’
The answer isn’t another pill. The answer is spinach.
Let’s make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake – you know, to send the right message to kids.
I wouldn’t touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use parts of the animal that the Chinese can’t figure out how to make into a belt? -timecode 1:11:10.
Recognition is one of the three big elements of comedy.