The whole problem with this idea of obscenity and indecency, and all of these things – bad language and whatever – it’s all caused by one basic thing, and that is: religious superstition.
Interesting form of murder we come up with: Assassination. We assassinate people who’ve told us to live together in harmony and try to love one another. Apparently we are not ready to live together.
Life is not that complicated.
I like my jokes to be built on a foundation of ideas, or at least smart observations.
The main reason women are crazy, is that men are stupid.
As powerful as anyone may claim God to be, somehow he always needs money.
Catholic school gave me the tools to reject the very religion they wanted me to have. They taught me how to think for myself and to be independent.
More people write poetry than read it.
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.
Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?
When you visualize the recent past, do you see it as being somewhere over on the left?
What exactly is “midair”? Is there some other part of air besides the “mid” part?
We now buy watches primarily for their looks, price, or additional functions. The fact that they tell time seems lost.
Broadway isn’t a very big career move. There’s no money in it and it doesn’t mean anything to your career. It’s just a nice little jewel in the crown.
I’m 63 now. But that’s just 17 Celsius.
We get what we deserve. They are our elected officials.
And, of course, the funniest food: “kumquats”. I don’t even bring them home anymore. I sit there laughing and they go to waste.
The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind.
War is rich old men protecting their property by sending middle class and lower class young men off to die. It always has been.
Golf is an arrogant, elitist game that takes up entirely too much space in this country.