Massachusetts became the first state to marry gay couples, though lawmakers say allowing gay couples to get married raises a lot of questions. You know, such as: does that best man invite both guys to the bachelor party?
Experts say that if we go to war with Iraq, oil could reach as much as $80 a barrel. Of course, after the war it will be free.
George W. Bush says he spends sixty to ninety minutes a day working out. He says he works out because it clears his mind. Sometimes just a little too much.
Now the Democrats control the Senate. But the good news is that now the Republicans can admit that Strom Thurmond has been dead since 1988.
Scientists in Australia are working on making biodegradable car parts out of hemp. This might get confusing. When someone says, roll up the window, they might mean, roll up the window!
Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton is now facing a kind of personal dilemma. She can’t decide whether to drop the name Clinton from her name, or drop the name Rodham. They can’t figure out which one is more embarrassing.
While visiting Kenya, former President Clinton was offered 40 goats and 20 cows for his daughter, Chelsea, by a love struck government official. Bill said, “No way!” How does that make Hillary feel? Bill almost gave her up for one cow.
Well, the big story – Hillary Clinton will be running for president in 2008. You know why I think she’s running? I think she finally wants to see what it’s like to sleep in the president’s bed.
The Democratic Leadership Council has named Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton to design a plan to help define an agenda to the Democratic party. Although Bill said today, in his experience, whenever Hillary enters the picture that’s when the party ends.
Bill Clinton is the only ex-president who hasn’t planned his own funeral. But, in his defense, in the past he has said he wants to be buried next to Hillary. I guess he figures he never slept next to her when they were alive, might as well try it now that they’re dead.
While President Bush was out of town Hillary Clinton stopped by the White House on Friday for an important meeting with her decorator.
Well, it looks like we’ve moved a step closer to war. Not with Iraq. With France and Germany. How did we screw that one up?
The Bush administration has apparently approved a plan to oust Saddam Hussein. I think that’s President Bush’s Father’s Day gift to his Dad.
If we go down in flames, we will be laughing on the way down, believe me.
I’m going to be going to a secluded spot where no one can find me – NBC prime time.
Scientists think they can now clone an all-white zebra. Now, I’m no expert, but isn’t that a horse?
With high definition TV, everything looks bigger and wider. Kind of like going to your 25th high school reunion.
An evangelical minister has had to resign after pictures surfaced showing him in a hot tub with two women. He claimed it was just a baptism gone terribly wrong.
Two Americans have been awarded the Nobel Prize for Economics. They are the first to figure out all the charges on their telephone bill.
A German psychologist says that women talk more than men because they have a bigger vocabulary. But, it evens out because men only listen half the time.