A lot of people up North, they think everybody from the South is married to their sister and has seen a UFO. I told them, ‘I’m just dating my sister and couldn’t swear that it wasn’t a weather balloon.’
The only negative about doing stand-up is that you’re on the road by yourself. When you’re on the road with comics we just crack each other up every night going, “Can you believe they’re paying us to do this? They’re crazy.”
You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.
People should see your faith. If all you do is talk about your faith and people don’t see it, but they ought to see it in the way you treat your family, you treat your friends, you treat your community.
You might be a redneck if you stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
You might be a redneck if your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
I think with a comedian, when you get to the point of a greatest hits, it’s kind of an acknowledgment that you’ve been doing stand-up a long time, which not very many people do.
I’ve gotten to the point I won’t even watch the 11 o’clock news. You just walk away from it thinking how bad everything is.
You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
Thank God I’m at that point in my career where I don’t have to take stuff that I don’t really want to do.
You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
I hope someday we can stamp out illiteracy in America. Of course you’ll have to kill alot of my relatives to do it.
I always wore cowboy boots and drove a truck, and talked like this. So everywhere I would go in comedy people would say, “Foxworthy, you ain’t nothing but a redneck from Georgia!” It kind of became a formula joke.
As an actor, there was that freedom of not having to worry about lights or marks or other people. It was just going out there and having fun with the character.
You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born.
As a comedian I appreciate every kind of comedy. You decide for yourself what you’re going to do.
You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.
You might be a redneck if your momma calls you over to help, cause she has a flat tire on her house.