What a man sees in the human race is merely himself in the deep and honest privacy of his own heart. Byron despised the race because he despised himself. I feel as Byron did, and for the same reason.
One must travel, to learn.
There is no family in America without a clock, and consequently there is no fair pretext for the usual Sunday medley of dreadful sounds that issues from our steeples.
To believe yourself brave is to be brave; it is the one only essential thing.
Literature is well enough, as a time-passer, and for the improvement and general elevation and purification of mankind, but it has no practical value.
If it is a Miracle, any sort of evidence will answer, but if it is a Fact, proof is necessary.
We are all ignorant; just about different things.
Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.
A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
It ain’t those parts of the Bible that I can’t understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand.
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
I don’t give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.
Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get.
Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.
The trouble ain’t that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain’t distributed right.