Mondays are fine. It’s your life that sucks.
You want to see the people you’ve sort of come to know and love, or love to hate, you want to see them develop in some way. And I hope people get sort of caught up in that arc.
Suggesting I hate people with religion because I hate religion is like suggesting I hate people with cancer because I hate cancer.
You should bring something into the world that wasn’t in the world before. It doesn’t matter what that is. It doesn’t matter if it’s a table or a film or gardening-everyone should create. You should do something, then sit back and say ‘I did that.’
Telling someone with depression to pull themselves together is about as useful as telling someone with cancer to just stop having cancer.
I’ve got three friends that you’d call famous, but I’m sure after 20 years, most of my friends will be famous or work in television, because that’s the nature of what your work is. When I was working in an office, most of my friends worked in offices.
I’ve never been insulted by hateful satanists for not believing in their devil. Only by loving Christians for not believing in their God.
I’ve never worked out what the moral of Humpty Dumpty is. I can only think of: Don’t sit on a wall, if you’re an egg.
It’s better to create something that others criticise than to create nothing and criticise others. Go create, have fun!!
Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean you’re right.
I think doing something creative is the most important thing to me, and I think it’s probably just good for the soul for anyone, whatever it is. You don’t have to be a film director – you can do gardening or something – but I think everyone needs to create something.
Unlike religious people, I look at all religions equally.
Enjoy life. Have fun. Be kind. Have worth. Have friends. Be honest. Laugh. Die with dignity. Make the most of it. It’s all we’ve got.
It’s a strange myth that atheists have nothing to live for. It’s the opposite. We have nothing to die for. We have everything to live for.
Be happy. It really annoys negative people.
If there is a God, why did he make me an atheist?
I think everyone has the ability to be loved.
Take a picture not a trophy This is how real men shoot animals.
People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they’re very rarely the same.
It’s going to be a night of partying and heavy drinking. Or as Charlie Sheen calls it: Breakfast.