Stand by your bed and salute me.
I didn’t flee a dictator or swim an ocean to be an American like some do. I just thought long and hard about it.
She still cared for me, and the best way I could make amends to her was to be happy. I do have a knack for finding great women.
It seemed that I performed better sober than drunk. Who knew?
If a man doesn’t know how to dance he doesn’t know how to make love, there I said it!
For my birthday that year Anne gave me an inflatable atlas globe, along with a birthday card in which she wrote: I give you the world. Have fun blowing it up.
Even the incorruptible are corruptible if they cannot accept the possibility of being mistaken. Infallibility is a sin in any man. All laws can be broken and are. Often.
After all this time I found that the novel is in fact punk rock.
I found out it is just as hard to make a movie that you are not proud of as it is to make one you love.
Sometimes they would just pay me to stay home and not do anything else, which sounds fantastic but doesn’t do much for your ego. Its probably a little like getting alimony-the money is nice but has a nasty aftertaste.
Oh Satan you’re a wily one.
I think comedy as an art involves the audience as a participant as much as is involves the artist.
With good parody, you have to be smarter that the people you’re parodying.
Ros was dead. He had loved heroin more than it loved him. I was shocked beyond imagining; he was the first of my friends to fall.
I knew that I had been partially right in the storeroom above the bar on Christmas Day. Whoever I had become had to die.
I had lived in fear of the fabled terrifying visions that assail chronic drinkers, but which had not yet attacked me.
I found the prospect daunting, but somehow comforting, too, because the counselors insisted it could be done, and, after all, many of them were recovering alcoholics themselves.
Former president George W. Bush released his new memoir. By the way, ‘memoir’ is just a fancy word for ’a bunch of stuff that happened to me.
Bush’s memoir is 512 pages. To be fair, 200 of those pages are just games and puzzles.
Dell Computers announced they’re releasing a competitor for the iPad. Now it is, in fact, a great alternative for people who already have an iPad, but are fed up with it working all the time.