No one ever says, ‘It’s only a game’ when their team is winning.
All patriarchal societies are either preparing for war, at war, or recovering from war.
One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.
I’m in favor of personal growth as long as it doesn’t include malignant tumors.
Test of Metal: Will of Iron, Nerves of Steel, Heart of Gold, Balls of Brass.
I am not a complete vegetarian. I eat only animals that have died in their sleep.
On Thanksgiving, you realize you’re living in a modern world. Millions of turkeys baste themselves in millions of ovens that clean themselves.
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
I’m sure Hitler was great with his family.
You live eighty years, and at best you get about six minutes of pure magic.
In football the object is to march into enemy territory and cross his goal. In baseball the object is to go home.
Barry Goldwater has definitely decided to be a candidate in ’64. He will campaign in all thirteen states.
If this is the best God can do, I’m not impressed.
Put two things together which have never been put together before, and some schmuck will buy it.
Flowers are one of the few things we buy, bring home, watch die, and we don’t ask for our money back.
Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?
Have you noticed when you wear a hat for a long time it feels like it’s not there anymore? And then when you take it off it feels like it’s still there?
Geologists claim that although the world is running out of oil, there is still a 200-hundred-year supply of brake fluid.
There’s this man who lives in the sky, and he has ten things he doesn’t want you to do, and you’ll burn for a long time if you do them. But he loves you.
The only thing high-definition television will do is provide sharper images of the garbage.