You know, if you’re an American and you’re born at this time in history especially, you’re lucky. We all are. We won the world history Powerball lottery.
I have such disdain for anybody who gets joy out of blowing the stuffing out of a little woodland creature, that I don’t really care if any of them gets shot.
The younger generation is supposed to rage against the machine, not for it. They’re supposed to question authority, not question those who question authority.
Now, I’m no doctor, but I am on TV. And in my professional opinion, George Bush is a paranoid schizophrenic.
We’re always on a tightrope. We’re trying to put together people who don’t make sense to be together, talking about issues that are sensitive and controversial. We’re mixing dangerous chemicals on a nightly basis.
I am so tired of rearranging my life around what the stupidest people might do.
Government – they used to teach it in college. It’s actually something you should study and learn and know how to do. The Republicans always run on the idea that government isn’t very effective. Well, not the way you do it. But it can be effective.
My wife always has a splitting archetype whenever I want to have sex.
African American Congressman Bobby Rush wore a hoodie on the floor of Congress to make a point this week. And they threw him out. They said a hoodie is too scary for Congress. Too scary? Have you ever looked into Michele Bachmann’s eyes?
If the NRA keeps messing with the President’s daughters, they’re going to have to start worrying about Michelle Obama’s guns.
In this country, a smart leader is suspect. That’s just the way it is. Even George Bush’s father, who was a lot smarter than the son, had to sort of prove that he wasn’t that bright.
Why are the patriots the ones who don’t want to spend money on trains?
Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’
I just don’t see why anybody would vote Republican in the Army. If you want to support the troops, if I was a troop, I would say, ‘You know how to support me? Don’t send me to stupid wars.’
I have two dogs. If I had retarded children, I’d be a hero. And yet, the dogs are pretty much the same thing.
Between trying to impeach Bill Clinton, Florida 2000, and the recall in California, I’m beginning to think that Republicans will do anything to win an election-except get the most votes.
Gingrich is the “foremost intellectual” in the Republican party like Gene Simmons is the foremost intellectual in “Kiss”.
There are good people who do good things, there are bad people who do bad things, but to get a good person to do a bad thing takes religion.
Life is not like a box of chocolates unless there’s a few turds in the box.
You can’t get saved if you don’t play.