Eunice Kennedy Shriver, President Kennedy’s sister, endorsed Arnold Schwarzenegger, said he’s not a womanizer. Of course by Kennedy standards that means he never drove one off a bridge.
I have two questions about Arnold Schwarzenegger. What does he know, and when will he know it?
I’m guessing our soldiers are happy to be leaving Iraq. It is no fun being in a country where there’s crumbling infrastructure and an ignorant population, but they said they’re happy to come home anyway.
Today Obama was seen leaving the White House in a nurse’s uniform on a flight to Cuba to smother Castro with a pillow.
I always say to my religious friends, if a pool had even one turd in it, would you jump in?
Edward Snowden gave a little press conference today. He is apparently seeking temporary asylum in Russia. Because, you know, when you’re tired of the government snooping into everything you do, Putin’s Russia is definitely the place you want to go.
When you tolerate intolerance, you’re not really being a liberal.
Death is nature’s way of killing you.
Did you see Britney Spears at the Video Music Awards? I don’t want to say that that performance was a disaster, but after the show, I saw Rudy Giuliani having his picture taken standing on her.
Sarah Palin’s whole family got into a drunken public fistfight. Something police are calling a ‘tragic case of trash-on-trash violence.’
Trusting the government to monitor your calls without listening. It’s kind of like trusting Chris Christie to pick up the McDonald’s and not eat the fries on the way home.
Republicans have pounced. They’re outraged. They say, ‘How dare you lie about caring for the people who got hurt in the war we lied them into?’
Sarah Palin should not be on vacation. She should be in summer school.
Mitt Romney was attacking Obama about our failing education system. He has a point. We are graduating millions of people in this country who are so lacking in basic analytical skills, they are considering voting for Mitt Romney.
I can’t stay mad at Pope Frank. I just can’t. It’s a funny situation that I like the pope and Mel Gibson doesn’t.
A cult is a cult, and that’s what a frat is. A place where they strip you of your personality and rebuild it in their image.
If it makes you feel any better we will be happy to attack a country that had nothing to do with it.
It’s that time of year again, April 15, taxes. I know it’s depressing, but just remember, you’re paying for roads, bridges, hospitals, and an army to keep the nation free. Unfortunately that nation is Afghanistan.
This is America. We don’t call an election before we know who won. That, after all, is the job of the Supreme Court.
This week Sarah Palin’s memoir became a bestseller. It’s not even out yet. It’s being translated into English.