What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?
Imagine Pulitzer prizefighting.
Imagine Oshkosh straitjackets for little insane children.
If you are sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Yesterday, my eyeglass prescription ran out.
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn’t live there?
Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle.
You know, the New Testament is pretty old. I think they should call them the Old Testament and the Most Recent Testament.
I heard that in relativity theory, space and time are the same thing. Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.
A metaphor is like a simile.
I’m a peripheral visionary.
The sun got confused about daylight savings time. It rose twice. Everything had two shadows.
The doctor says he has to amputate all of me.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
I Xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra Xerox machine.
People may think I’m trying something new by telling stories, but they’re just jokes connected to give the illusion of stories. But really, I just continue using my imagination and creating. That’s what I do.
I have two pairs of reading glasses. One pair is for reading fiction, the other for non-fiction. I’ve read the Bible twice wearing each pair, and it’s the same.